wow

My thirteen year old cousin, Amar, is the average grade 7 boy. athletic, stupid, picks fights and likes math.

just the other day though, he apparently had so much dinner that he gorged himself enough to be taken to the hospital. the doctor's said he ate too much.

wimp.

i remember those days, when i was a fat tub of lard, i could handle it. back on the days when mom would make pasta, my mind would be like a wolf's. "eat as much as you can before the rest of the pack devours it" i'm not talking seconds people. i'm talking thirds and fourths!

but never... never in my life did i eat too much end up in the emergency room. i could handle it!
sure, i may not have been able to walk right after, and of course i would be regretting it (just like sushi nights) but i would eventually be able to rise like a pheonix.

of course, i've grown wiser now, and it's just me and mom at home these days. the wolf pack's gotten smaller. less competition means leftovers!

.. on my chinny chin chin

in the past few weeks, i have altered the appearance of my beard slightly.

just enough so there is a patch of hair from my "soulpatch" that goes just under my chin. i have decided not to trim this part of my beard, but to rather, let it grow.

nothing big really, but boy does it piss some people off!! although it annoys my girlfriend, i believe she is learning to cope, or just hiding it well. she'll still hold my hand in public so that's a good thing

but some people are truly annoyed by it
people that i don't even see that often

it's as if i offended their religion or something

so i have decided to do what was called for

i'm gonna let it grow, for the sake of all mankind
accept me for who i am.... you animals!

TOUGH

Many nights i have rested on my back in bed and watched the intensity of my mind create little images from the patterns of the paint on my ceiling.

Just like watching the clouds, i've seen it all;
ducks, sheep, toatsters, '57 chevy belairs, mario and luigi, etc.

but last night shocked me. the constellation of specs on the ceiling revealed what looked like a man, down on all fours (get your mind out of the gutter people) and a little toddler behind him with a cricket stick, whaling away on the guys balls. what surprised me though, was that this dude was smiling.

and i said to myself..."that dude's tough!"

I know i know,

Many have called me to complain about the lack of entries.

heck, there weren't even any for the entire month of march.

well i don't care, i'll write when i want to. besides, i was busy and bombarded with quite a few obstacles.

many factors prevented me from writing. one being that my computer was frozen by microsoft since the bastards somehow found that i had an illegal copy of windows and requested a "key" for me to reuse it again. another was that i was compelled watching the going-ons of the vatican while my friend was holding a "countdown to necro-pope"

and finally, i was learning how to relax

i quit working my night job at the theatre on the 10th of march, exactly one month ago. now i have free time to do what i do so please, such as play ps2 and memorize all the cheat codes to GTA san andreas

r1, r2, l1, x, left, down, right, up, left, down, right, up
r1, r2, l1, r2, left, down, right, up, left, down, right, up

dat's right, full health, armor and weapons
DON'T MESS!
and i still find ways to die

oh hockey, why don't you start up again!

You know you're growing old when....

Just the other day i was brushing my teeth in the morning and i noticed a white speck in one of my nostrils. So being the wise one that i am, i glanced at my other nostril to see if it had a white speck as well.

This is something that i normally do when i check things on my body. if i find a mark or bump on one side of me, i quickly check to see if there is a similar one on the other side, if so, my body is symmetrical and i'm doing fine.

Anyways, going back to the nose, there wasn't a second white speck.

Naturally i suspected that it was a booger, so placing the toothbrush to the side i blew my nose as hard as i could. glancing back at the mirror, the white speck was still there so i leaned in to have a closer inspection.

It was a white hair... in my nose.

I HAD A WHITE NOSEHAIR!

i've had white hairs on my scalp from an early age, so those were no shock to me, it's one of the prime reasons why i shave my head.

just a year ago, i began to see white hairs in my beard and i've learned to accomodate them.

but finding one in my nose has taken it too far!
i grabbed hold of it with my index finger and thumb and with great might, pulled the sucker out.

looked back at the mirror to see a nostril full of black hairs while a tear of pain rolled down my cheek.